Thursday, November 17, 2011

Men Who Don’t Brawl, Cheat, or Smack Women Around

Elizabeth Zelvin

A few weeks ago I found myself trying to explain to a group of feminists how come my series protagonists are male. The occasion was a reception at a conference on activism in academia that also celebrated the fortieth anniversary of the Barnard Center for Research on Women. I was there with a friend. The official conference T-shirt said, “Dare to say the F word—Feminist.” Suzanne Vega, who’s a Barnard grad, sang a set, including her hit song about domestic violence. And the topic came up.

This issue is not new. Plenty of writers and other publishing-biz folks have wondered why I don’t write about a strong female protagonist, since it’s obvious that I’m a woman who dares to say the F word all the time. The writer answer is that it happened by accident. In my first manuscript, I had two protagonists: recovering alcoholic Bruce and world-class codependent Barbara alternated first-person chapters. Many revisions and rejections later, a big-press editor, male, encouraged me to rewrite it with Bruce as protagonist and Barbara as sidekick, and a legendary editor, female, at the same press accepted it. My friend at the conference, who’s a kick-ass activist academic as well as a writer who loves my work, says, “Barbara’s a strong female character.” She is, in spite of her occasional ditsiness and chronic backsliding into codependency. I’ve even given her a more-than-equal share in the mayhem that ensues when she and Bruce confront the murderer in each book in the series. But she’s still just a sidekick.

As I discovered in this conversation with the feminists, there’s another layer of explanation for my willingness to champion a guy in print. And my inner therapist has figured out that it comes not from the writer-wanna-get-published side of me, but from my personal history and psychological truth. The men I know best—my father, my husband, and my adult son—do not and never have brawled, cheated, or smacked women around. Nor are they relentlessly seductive, and neither are most of the men I’ve known. So to me, men are not the enemy. I’ve had male friends my whole life—well, from age 11 in junior high, some of whom are still my friends today—through high school (where I didn’t know any mean girls either) to my various professional lives—mystery writer, mental health professional, poet, singer/songwriter—who have been just that: friends.

So in a sense I’m baffled by the hardboiled PI who’s quick with his fists and can take out a bad guy with a karate kick. They don’t match my experience. I don’t even get the suburban divorcee who’s kissing the detective on the case before they’ve figured out whodunit. I’ve met, even worked with quite a few cops, and not one of them has so much as patted my fanny. Okay, I get it. If fiction were more like life, it would be boring. There are certain conventions, and suspending disbelief to accommodate them is part of our contract as readers. We don’t have to have met any murderers to enjoy reading mysteries, much less killed anyone ourselves. But it’s important to acknowledge that the world is full of guys who have never given another guy a bloody nose, are comfortable being faithful to their wives or partners, and wouldn’t hit a woman in a million years.

12 comments:

Pauline Alldred said...

There's the myth of the American tough guy. He's in Western movies and action/adventure books and movies. Now, he's in kids' video games. And another myth is that women adore this tough guy with the perfect set of muscles. The fictional tough guy will live forever.
I agree. Real men are more than their reflexes and testosterone but as long as the tough guy remains popular, he'll show up in stories and movies.

Sheila Connolly said...

Lee Child's Jack Reacher seems to be one example of a contemporary knight errant who appeals to both men and women readers. The kicker is, men admire him but women want to be him. I think for both sides Reacher represents a kind of freedom--he's not tied down with personal commitments or tangible stuff. (He may brawl and cheat in the interest of achieving justice, but I don't recall that he smacks any women around.)

I'm in the process of rewriting for the nth time a book I wrote several years ago as a romantic thriller in which the protagonist is an academic feminist who teaches at a women's college. Yes, there's a HEA, after the (female) protagonist has saved the (male) love interest's butt a few times. Will this find an audience, or will it alienate readers? I have no idea.

Elizabeth Zelvin said...

Lee Child in person is a lovely guy, but Reacher has no appeal whatever for me. As a shrink and a born schmoozer, I value connections, while he's a commitmentphobe. And then there's the underwear thing....

Barbara Emrys said...

One of my favorite male characters is Jimmy Paz is Michael Gruber's trio of novels. Gruber has written a lot about sons and mothers, and Paz has a major one he has to learn to listen to. Paz is a character who tries to live the life he thinks a guy like him ought to, fails royally, and survives to move on.

Leslie Budewitz said...

Love the male protagonist who solves the case with wits and hard work -- not fists and hard ass-ery. Guido Brunetti comes to mind, along with Brother Cadfael, Duncan (oh, what's his last name?) Kincaid, Thomas Lynley. Of course, many combine both -- Crispin Guest, Bill Smith, Amos Walker. There's definitely a place on my shelf for the tough guy, as long as there's a little more to him than the stereotype.

Leslie Budewitz said...

Oh, it occurs to me as I see my list of male protags who do use their fists that they all do it in pursuit of justice -- they don't brawl for the fun of it (which isn't to say they don't enjoy getting in a good jab or winning the fight!), and they certainly don't cheat or smack women. They are men of honor, even when it hurts!

zvajeni-ta-shaslivi said...

Love the male protagonist who solves the case with wits and hard work

Julia Buckley said...

I agree, Liz, that there are many great real-life examples of men who don't perpetuate the tough-guy myth. (Although my own nice sons are fascinated by the toughs in movies and books).

But I've met the some true-blue sexist jerks, and it's disheartening to know that they're still around in 2011.

L.J. Sellers said...

I purposefully avoided the tough-guy, short-fused, bitter-alcoholic-cop stereotype when I created Detective Jackson. I wanted a character I could get inside and live with for months and years at a time. Both male and female readers seem to identify with him and keep asking for more.

Anita Page said...

Liz, I'm with you on Jack Reacher. For me, vulnerable is sexy. My favorite fictional cop is John Harvey's Charlie Resnick, a middle-aged jazz-lover who keeps cats, is a bit of a slob, and wants to see justice done.

Anonymous said...

Liz -- what a fascinating post. Great points.

BrendaW.

Gloria Alden said...

I so totally agree with you, Liz.
My father, my brothers,and my sons are or were good guys. I can't think of very many men who fit that nasty character, but then I never cultivated a friendship with anyone who might have fit that characteristic. I really like Bruce, by the way. Gloria Alden